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Plot : Nick Hendricks (Jason Bateman) arrives to his job at a wealthy financial firm at 6:00 am. He hurries into the building, briefly trades "Good Morning's" with the security guard at the front desk and waits at the elevator. Above the elevator door is a large electronic clock which reads 6:02 am. Nick makes it to his floor, runs to his cubicle and immediately gets to work. Two hours later his phone rings; his boss, Dave Harken (Kevin Spacey) wants to talk with him. Harken has been dangling a promotion over Nick's head for the past eight years, and Nick has been working 16 hour days to get it. Harken reprimands Nick for being two minutes late that morning and tells Nick that tardiness doesn't lead to promotions. Nick apologizes and he is soon offered to share a drink with Harken. Nick reluctantly accepts (due to the hour) and is shocked to see Harken fill only one glass with scotch, almost to the brim. He forces Nick to drink it all by himself. Nick coughs and sputters as he downs the drink, but does it anyway for the promotion.
Meanwhile, Dale Arbus (Charlie Day) is dropped off at work by his fiance Stacie (Lindsay Sloane). At work Dale repels constant sexual harassment by his man-eating dentist boss Julia Harris (Jennifer Aniston). She toys with Dale; tells him to have sex with her at all times of the day, and fondles her unconscious male dental patients. Dale refuses her advances, citing that he is engaged and he wouldn't want to betray his fiance. Elsewhere, Kurt Buckman (Jason Sudeikis) loves his job. He is the acting second-in-command at Pellitt Chemicals owned by the warm and generous Jack Pellitt. Kurt is well-liked by all of Jack's employees, except for Jack's rude, spoiled and rotten son Bobby Pellitt (Colin Ferrell). Bobby frequents the company bathroom, where he snorts cocaine, and shows genuine disgust for his co-workers, especially Kurt. Jack and Kurt walk out to the parking lot, where Jack says that he hopes for Kurt to manage the company once he retires. Jack jumps into his car and suffers an immediate heart attack, killing him.
That evening all three friends meet at a local bar where they trade horror stories about their bosses. Nick says he would quit, but his promotion is in the bag. Kurt loves his job, and he's just afraid of what Bobby will do to the company now that he's in charge. Dale wishes he could find a new dentist to work for but explains that finding a job is difficult because he is a wrongfully labelled sex offender (after taking a drunken leak on a vacant playground next to a bar one night, and getting busted by the cops for indecent exposure). Nick suggests that they all look for new jobs when their childhood, and most likely to succeed, classmate Kenny Sommerfeld (PJ Byrne) wanders into the bar and explains how tough life was after losing millions while working for Lehman Brothers. Now he can't even get hired as a waiter, and the only way he earns money is performing sexual favors in the bar bathroom. The three realize that the possibility of finding new work is slim and commit to keeping their jobs.
The next morning Nick heads into work and is caught off guard by an emergency staff meeting. Nick has a feeling that the purpose of the meeting is to announce his promotion to company Vice President. It would mean more money, better hours, and more respect from Harken. Harken arrives, 15 minutes late, complains that his wife is cheating on him with every man in the neighborhood, and openly berates Nick for being a drunk before promoting himself to Nick's coveted job. Nick daydreams of throwing Harken out a window, but only ends up begging Harken for an explanation as to why he led Nick along for so many years. Harken rudely tells Nick that he likes him as his bitch and that he'll never be promoted. Nick angrily tells Harken that he will quit and get a better job elsewhere to which Harken retorts that he'll send out a fabricated letter of discouragement to every other financial firm in the country, saying that Nick is insubordinate, tardy, an alcoholic and very bad at his job. In short, Harken would blackball Nick from the industry if he decided to quit.
Kurt heads into work three hours late, after spending the morning at Jack Pellitt's funeral. Bobby teases Kurt and reveals his intentions for the company: he intends to sell it, collect the profits and retire on a tropical beach filled with hookers and cocaine. He tells Kurt to fire all the fat and disabled people starting with the obviously pregnant "Large Marge".
Dale heads into work and is called into Julia's office. She locks the door behind him and Dale is surprised to find that she is practically naked, save for a pair of panties and a lab-coat. She implores that Dale have sex with her and berates him with offensive names. Dale ignores her come-ons and explains that he has a fiance and that he would never betray her trust. Dale threatens to quit, until Julia brings up that he is a sex offender and nobody else would ever hire him. Dale storms out of the room, to Julia's delight.
That evening the three meet again. Kurt and Nick joke about their desire to kill their bosses while Dale, who is disgusted with Julia, would never consider murdering her. Dale storms out, while the other two re-enforce that the thought was simply a joke.
Dale returns to work the next morning and is surprised to see his fiance, Stacie, in Julia's office. Stacie explains that Julia called her up and offered some free dental work as a wedding gift. Dale attempts to turn down the offer, but is unable to do so without letting on to his and Julia's relationship. With Stacie passed out in the dentist's chair, Julie goads Dale into having sex with her ON TOP of Stacie. Dale refuses again, which prompts Julia to pull out an iPad filled with risque photos of Dale and Julia taken by Julia while Dale was unconscious. She threatens to show the images to Stacie unless Dale has sex with her. Dale escapes her office yet again.
That evening the three meet at Kurt's house. Dale arrives and shouts "I'm in! Let's kill this bitch!" The other two, who were both under the impression that their conversation of murder was only a joke, try to calm Dale down, but Dale is still infuriated by Julia's actions and explains that he already has a plan.
The following evening, the three meet at a run-down motel room. Dale has gone on Craigslist and hired a "Wet Work" specialist on the men-seeking-men section. Nick and Kurt are surprised that Dale not only found an assassin on Craigslist, but managed to secure his services for only $200. The Wetwork Man (Ioan Gruffudd) pulls his car into the parking lot. He is well dressed, drives an expensive European sports car, and speaks in an English accent. The Wetwork Man enters the motel room and after a moment of confusion, explains that he is no assassin, but rather a gigolo for fetishists and that "Wetwork" is a code-name for a man who urinates on other men for arousal. The three pay the man for his time, but not his services, and flee the motel...
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